Its going too fast!!! I can't believe it. Sometimes, just to torture myself, I scroll back through ALL the pictures of the boys from the day they were born. From this chair, its so easy not to see the hard parts. There are no pictures of the recovery from a major abdominal surgery. No pictures of the 1, 3, or 5 am feedings or struggles through breast feeding, sleep deprivation or the simple "unknown". But, there ARE pictures of two of the most amazing parts of my life. Their tiny hands and feet, big alert eyes and scrumptious gummy smiles.
What I don't understand is with all this love...why is there so much pain? Sometimes, when I look at them and my heart hurts, physically. Is it because its so full? Is it just an overwhelming feeling? Is it the knowledge that you love this creature so much but know that you can't protect him forever? This mother-love is so fierce. I see why its so hard to let go when it comes time. Maybe I just won't. They would have to live with me forever if I requested, right? For goodness sakes, I carried them around for 9 months, changed their diapers and nursed them for hours! Its the least they could do! Ha. In reality, I know God has plans for them. I pray that they are grand. I pray we raise boys who are respectful, loving and strong. Luckily, we have a whole extended family of men who exemplify those very characteristics.
Now, onto some pictures...
This should have been documented with the video camera. Their 1st official "conversation" with each other!
Explanation: Whenever we would pull their shirts over their heads, their eyes would get HUGE and they looked so freaked out. So, I tried a little desensitization work. I would pull them halfway and we would all laugh (yes, the boys, too). Now, they think getting dressed is funny.We have a Dr. appt on Thursday. We will finally know their height and weight and have their 1st vaccination. Big day!
3 comments:
so precious....looks like you're doing a great job mommy!
I can totally relate, Dana. I look at Olivia, and I just ache because I know how quickly it goes. Patrick and Matthew are already 9 and 6. I just want to protect them all forever. (and I too look through pictures every day just to torture myself) Your boys are beyond precious- blessings for a wonderful and magical Christmas season with them.
Oh Dana, they are so amazing! I can't believe how BIG Evan is! I need to get up for a visit very soon, or they'll be toddling around before we know it. You are such a wonderful mommy, you boys are going to be all that you hope for them, without a doubt! Love, Linda
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